Well it is nice to be back here. i have really missed frequenting the Covenspace pages... Lately I have been in sort of a spiritual quandry. With the way that my life has been going I seem to have lost my connection to the God & Goddess. Well maybe not lost, because the connection is always there, but I seem to be distanced from sensing the connection. I just don't seem to be able to find the time to meditate, The last ritual I was at was over a year ago. I just can't seem to find myself anymore. I miss it badly and want it back!!! I have been trying to read, but just don't seem to be able to consentrate. I am partisapating somewhat with the Fort Hood Open Circle, and I am trying to go through Sacred Wells deaconry course (Sacred Wells sponsors the FHOC) but I just can't focus. That goes for every thing else in my life I just cant seem to focus on anything. I have so much to get accomplished and yet, I get in these appathetic moods where I just don't care. I don't know what to do to shake it. I don't know what is wrong... I am not sure what is blocking me... and it is driving me crazy... i don't like this feeling of non-connection... If anyone has any suggestions I am open to any advise...

 

Love, Blessings and Friendship,

Bill

I have started reading Raven Grimassi's book "Spirit of the Witch". There is a passage in the book that I wanted to share with all of you.

"The following story is fictional, but the truth it conveys is real and viable. Many centuries ago there lived a woman who was a great spiritual teacher. She drew many seekers to the teachings she revealed, and around her formed a group of devoted disciples. After many years of study the disciples left and journeyed to other lands to spread the teachings they had learned.

The years went by and one day the disciples returned and sought out their old teacher. Once they found her, the disciples posed a question to the master. "We have," their spokesperson remarked, "traveled to many lands, and discovered many different teachings that are unlike the ways that you have taught us." The master calmly nodded in acknowledgement, and the disciple continued, "Therefore we are confused, so can you tell us which is the true religion?" The master looked up with a patient smile and replied, "All of the religions of the world are like individual pearls. Each of them formed around a different grain of sand, in different waters, under different conditions." Then the master looked directly at the spokesperson and spoke softly, saying, "But, if you ask me which is the true pearl, I will tell you that none of them are the one true pearl. Instead, the truth is the thread that runs through, holding them together as a necklace, that is the one truth you seek."

This story illustrates an important truth. When I first taught Witchcraft as a religion many years ago, I began a series of classes with what I called "The View of the Crystal." I placed a very large, oddly shaped piece of crystal on the floor. Then I had the students sit in a circle around the crystal. Next I asked each student to describe what he or she saw in front of their eyes. Naturally each person described the crystal somewhat differently, because the visual perspective of each individual was different, according to his or her position in relationship to the crystal.

Some people described the crystal as being sharp and jagged. Other individuals described the crystal as smooth and polished, covered with beautiful facets. Still other men and women depicted the crystal differently from even those descriptions. So, who was right and who was wrong? What did the crystal actually look like?

In a short time it became clear to every one that each person was correct in his or her perception of the crystal, but that each individual's "truth" was only a small part of a much larger whole that existed beyond the single view of any one individual. It was also conceded that the "truth" of one person did not negate the truth of another. Everyone simply had his or her personal view and experience of the crystal. In the end we spoke a great deal about the fact that the only way for us all to know the whole truth about the crystal was for each person to integrate the perspectives shared by all of the others.

We joked around for a while about how odd it would be if everyone in the room were to argue that their view of the crystal was the only true view. We talked about how angry an individual might get about his or her personal view being dismissed entirely by some or all of the other people. It all seemed so clear and simple in that small room with the crystal centered between us, but sadly we knew that in the real world people have hated and killed each other over their personal view of the crystal for thousands of years, and many still do today."

I found that simple passage from his book to hold so much truth to it. Even in paganism the different traditions get so focused on their view of the crystal. Once you become so focused on your view of the crystal and ignore the whole of it you start explaining yourself in how you are different, how your view is better and the only view, instead of focusing on how similar your views are and what is the same in your views.

We each have a different perspective on the crystal, if we all had the same view life would be very boring but I feel that we all have enough common ground that we should be able to come together as a whole with shared similarities and expand our own knowledge by leaning and educating ourselves together rather than alone.

In Love and Light,

Bill

Here is an excert from an artical by Kerr Cuhulain...

 "A man who appropriately accesses the archetypal Warrior draws upon enormous resources that enable him to live an empowered life in the service of his fellow creatures... When the Warrior is on-line, we feel a rush of blood and adrenaline, a quickening heartbeat, and a sense of something momentous about to happen. We feel mobilized for action, ready to charge forward to meet life head-on. Our daily concerns fall away from us and we are swept up into a kind of ecstacy in which we see ourselves and the world with a sharpened focus and clarity. Hidden rage is transmuted into energized courage. We come into touch with the great mystery of life and death, and we feel a strange sense of pleasure in the midst of pain."

 This Warrior aspect of Paganism is truly starting to speak to me and really opening up my vision and encompassing the pagan community as a whole. I feel I am becoming a true Pagan Warrior.

In Love and Light,

Bill

Each player starts with eight random facts/habits or embarrassing things about themselves. People who are tagged need to write their own blog about their own eight things and post these rules. At the end of your blog you need to choose eight people to get tagged and list their names. Don't forget to leave them a comment telling them they're tagged and to read your blog.

1. Born in Ohio but grew up in Los Angeles, CA.

2. I drank two beers this evening and I feel fine...LOL.

3. I love animals too, more than people. They really love you when they love you. No games.

4. I really would love to quit all of my jobs and run away for awhile.

5. On Oct 20 th I will have been in the U.S. Army for 20.

6. When I was 6 or 7 I slept walked to the hallway out side of my door and pee'ed in the halway thinking it was the bathroom                

7. In the same time frame as #6 one evening being fully awake I tried to give my Mom a hair cut... Instead I sliced the sheets up to her bed.

8. My Wife drives me crazy. When she falls asleep on the couch that is where she stayes. I am not putting up with the turmoil.

 

Heather, Tommy Elf, Heggity, Arwen, Cherie, Chenoa, TygrzByte, Draconia, em*

Hey All I just wanted to drop by and let you all know that I have not been able to get on teh internet in forever... Well OK 2 weeks, but still!!! My Internet is back up and rolling, I still do not have a work account but that is not really a bad thing, That just means alot of half days and 4 day weekends...LOL Well I just wanted to pop on here and let you all know I was back up...

 In Love and Light,

Bill